[TamilNet, Friday, 21 April 2012, 14:40 GMT]
A profound and hitherto unheard sentiment was echoed by Fisting Expert and Chief Minister of Toilet Nadu M. Karunanidhi as he promised Tamil Eelam “is just around the corner” and the Tamil only speaking stateless people of the world will soon be granted a separate state to self-immolate and bang their goats forever in peace.
According to completely verified reports from around the world Tamil only people are celebrating the imminent establishment of Tamil Eelam with festivals of Traditional Eelam sports activities. Tamil N’ggars in Toronto celebrated this by holding a game of “Pet the goat” in Scarborough while Toilet scrubbers in Sydney celebrated with a round of Australia’s next Top Janitor competition. Furthermore in celebration a team of marathon runners trained in Tamil Nadu has been sent to Sri Lanka where they are running the heroic Tamil Eelam Marathon in Killinochchi.
Sinhalese are said to be mortally afraid with the recent relvelations about Eelam by Eelam’s foremost fisting expert with Sinhala soliders covering in their bunkers and praying to Sinhala only gods and the common man preparing for the coming Tamil-pocalypse.
In Sri Lanka, where Tamil Eelam will be established even though 95% of the Tamil population resides elsewhere, Tamil people celebrated the Karunanidhi statement with optimism and relief.
“We have been genocide by the Sinhala regime since Thalivar decided to take a well-deserved vacation from establishing Eelam ”
commented one coolie from Vauniya adding
“Karunanidianna’s belief and support is much welcome in improving the life for Tamil only people in Eelam”
Scholars point out that the most recent statement of declaring Tamil Eelam in Sri Lanka is another of a long run of “Eelam is just around the corner” statements made by Tamil only leaders, a tradition spanning more than 1000000 years. While most scholars agree that Eelam is inevitable it is generally accepted by the Tamil only masses that the genocidal Sinhalese occupiers need to be eradicated first in order to achieve it.